Every now and then God speaks so loudly and clearly that you can’t help but hear. Can’t help but pay attention. You may not understand – that’s a whole different thing – but you hear. And that’s a great start.
Back in June a group of ladies from our church spent the weekend in Cascade at a family’s cabin. The purpose was to have fun, fellowship, and food – three things I can whole-heartedly dive into.
As I was loading up my car on Friday afternoon, Ivy gave me a piece of paper. She gives me LOTS of pieces of paper. Sometimes with drawings. Sometimes with words. Sometimes both. Sometimes they make sense. Sometimes, well, not so much. But ALWAYS do I love them. This was no different. She had copied down a Bible verse that was on a craft project from a week or two previous.
I told her how wonderful it was – and that I would tuck it away in my journal so that I could think of her and that verse while I was away. Then I left.
On Saturday morning we spent some time discussing THIS particular verse – the one Ivy had given me. Jesus spoke these words during Hanukkah, at the Feast of Lights. So we spent time looking at the significance of this, discussing what this means in our lives. From there we went to a story about a child:
A child admiring the stained glass windows in her church one morning asked her mother about the people pictured in them. ‘Those are God’s saints’, her mother explained. ‘They are people who proved their love for Him.’
In her Sunday school class sometime later, the girl’s teacher asked the class to explain what a saint is. ‘Saints are people the light shines through,’ the child wisely replied.
We then read through three verses that showed that WE are called saints. You. Me. We.
Romans 1:7 To all in Rome who are loved by God and called to be saints: Grace and peace to you from God our Father and from the Lord Jesus Christ.
Ephesians 1:1 Paul, an apostle of Christ Jesus by the will of God, to the saints in Ephesus, the faithful in Christ Jesus.
Ephesians 1:18 I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints.
A saint is defined as “dedicated to God, set apart as holy or sacred”.
The question following this was: “So, if we are saints, children of Light, the light of the world…How then should we live? How are you currently living as a child of light? And in what ways are you still living in “darkness”?
Everyone shared, talked, and discussed these questions with passion and fervor. Everyone but me. I didn’t have a single thing to add. Honestly, it was a bit much for me. I was still trying to wrap my poor little brain around the first verse. So I stayed silent and listened.
When we broke apart for quiet time – to read, pray, and contemplate quietly, I internally sighed and thought to myself, “Oh great. Now I get to sit here and stare at my Bible and this piece of paper and pretend to have some enourmous revelation.” Not so psyched. I was looking forward to the hot springs and a nice long walk.
But, until then, I had to at least look like I knew what I was doing. So I flipped open my (GIGANTIC) Bible, and this is the page it opened to:
I read it twice. Maybe three times. Surely there can’t be that many verses on Light in the Bible yet I had stumbled upon a really beautiful one that wasn’t included in our (I thought) fairly extensive list. I showed it to Julie, the discussion leader. She was thrilled – thought that it said that God was showing me something, that He was speaking to me. Well, if that’s the case, He’s going to have to be a lot more clear because I still wasn’t getting the message.
After half an hour or so we re-grouped to share what we had found. As we did my journal fell open and the piece of paper that Ivy had sweetly scribbled the Bible verse on the previous day fell out. My jaw about hit the floor. I showed that to Julie as well. You can imagine the reaction. If the first verse was an obvious sign of a message from God, then this was just icing on the cake. I shared it with the group and they were equally amazed, but sadly, no one had an “answer” for me as to what this might mean. It was my puzzle to work out apparently.
We spent the rest of the weekend, talking, laughing, singing, soaking in hot springs, hiking around the mountain, eating and drinking, and I gave no more thought to my messages of Light.
Until I got home.
Johnny had left the day before for a flying job in Washington. Luckily, his mom and step-dad were in town doing a bit of house hunting so we had a place for the girls to hang out while I went on my girls’ retreat.
I arrived home to a quiet, empty house. I showered, unpacked, cleaned up the dishes that had been left in the sink. (Ahem.) A couple of hours later Susie and Roger brought the girls home, properly sugared up from a quick stop at Baskin-Robbins on the way over. They had been house hunting with a realtor that lives in Emmet. She has a small farm and they spent a bit of time there showing the girls the chickens and cows and horses. She was kind enough to send them home with a dozen eggs for me. Susie gave them to me and said that she always put a Bible verse inside the carton. Out of curriosity, I opened it. And about dropped the eggs.
Then it was off to church. We have a really wonderful band in our church. It rocks, literally. It’s a get up and dance kind of a place. No hymns here. Thank goodness – a soprano I am NOT. So, as always, the band is rockin’ and they played one of my favorite songs – “Marvelous Light” by Charlie Hall. If you’d like to listen, you can go here. We sang it loud and strong. Here’s the lyrics to the first verse:
Into marvelous light I’m running
Out of darkness, out of shame
By the cross You are the truth
You are the life, You are the way
As we’re singing, and I hear the reference to Light over and over and over, it’s almost as if I can feel that Light beaming down on me. I was sure others could see it. I started to cry, but oh I kept singing. Belting it out in my best off-key but loud voice. Then we sang this verse:
Lift my hands and spin around
See the light that I have found
Oh the marvelous light
Marvelous light
We sang it twice and both times I just stood there, sort of swaying to the music. Feeling it but not truly allowing it to move ME. And after that second time, I realized I so badly wanted to throw my hands up – to really allow the Light inside, to feel it fully and express it outwardly. But the song started to wind down. I almost choked on my happy tears. In my head I said a silent prayer, “Please God just let them play that one more time and I will throw my hands up to you and I will fully express your Marvelous Light.”
And they did.
Now, please understand, this sort of jumping around throwing your arms up and practically screaming the words of a song I had always reserved for rock concerts. But this isn’t your normal conservative buttoned-up suit wearing kind of church. (Or, in my world THAT was the normal.) The music, as I mentioned, ROCKS. The feeling is utterly spiritual. People will speak out often with an “AMEN.” “Praise Jesus.” People put their hands in the air. They spin around. They are giddy with the Light and Love of God. And so was I.
Afterward, the smile on my face beamed. My eyes sparkled. I had felt the Light. I knew what it was. I knew what it FELT like.
The following morning, I started off my day as I do most, by reading in my book “Daily Om” by Madisyn Taylor. And when I opened the book, I nearly fell out of my chair.
This was the title of the day’s inspirational reading. How could that be??!! I was still high on the fullness I had felt the night before. I knew what it meant. I have that Light, we all do of course, but I had tapped in, and reached it, and now I had to start spreading it.
In Love and Light,
Dena
Dena Stoltz 